Later That Morning

The phone rang.

At 4am I had woken up alone, cold and adrift in a sea of quilts. The silence in our room was so thick I thought I would drown in it.

I picked up the phone.


This post was written in response to the Trifecta Writing Challenge  weekend prompt:

Complete the following story in exactly 33 words. The 5 we have given you are NOT to be counted in the 33 words.

The phone rang at 4am.

I admit, I’m playing a little fast and loose with the rules. I am starting with the same five words; there was no rule against moving the punctuation around.

11 responses to “Later That Morning

  1. I love how you created the image of a sea and drowning with her in bed.

  2. I love when people twist the rules!

  3. I love that you changed the punctuation. Creative! Lovely imagery here.

  4. Scriptor Obscura

    I am really wondering who was on the other end of the phone? Who was calling her/him??? Was it their missing partner who should have been in the bed with them? Please continue this story, I want to know more! Don’t leave us hanging! Who was it???

  5. I love it when you play fast and loose with the rules.
    This reeked of desperation, of feeling lost. “our room”…whose room? And who is calling? Was the other person gone all night? Gone for good?
    This is both intense and vague in ways that make me feel like it’s at the start of a really good book.
    Came from the Trifextra linkup.

  6. Great start to a book. Would love to know who is not there. Is she drowning in her blankets from sadness? From a loss? Well done!

  7. I felt lonely just reading that! I’d love to read more! What happens next?

  8. Great imagery. I like how you “rearranged” the prompt.

  9. Thanks so much for linking up to Trifextra. Remember, this weekend’s entries are being judged by the Trifecta community, so make sure you visit the site at the close of the challenge to vote. Our linking service will not allow you to vote for a link from the same computer where it was submitted, so plan ahead! Voting closes 12 hours after the close of the challenge. Winners will be announced with the Monday post. Hope to see you back then.

  10. And to have her answer in the last line is so poignant.

  11. Wonderful wordplay. And punctuation-play. I’m a rule-bender myself, so I say it’s all good!

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