Crush

Window

“There’s nothing cute about it,” he said. The register of his voice indicated decision more so than discussion.

She disagreed heartily and privately, staring past his head and out the window behind him. “Andy, she’s fourteen. You treat her like a princess. Of course she’s going to fall in love.”

Andy looked back at the perfectly arranged line of headless mice on the doorstep, and shuddered.


For this weekend’s Trifextra prompt, the folks at Trifecta Writing Challenge gave us the first 33 words of a story (in italics above), and required us to complete it with 33 of our own words. This weekend, the judging is up to you, dear readers, so if you think my story is worth a vote, please visit the Trifecta page and vote for Crush | Trudging Through Fog.

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14 responses to “Crush

  1. Scriptor Obscura

    Is this talking about a cat, or a teenage girl? I’m thinking a very spoiled cat here…???

  2. Kittehs!!! Here’s my headless mouse story. I never used to be bugged by mice, by the way.

    But.

    I lived at home throughout college, partially because I started at 16, and partially because I was very much a homebody. We always had a healthy regimen of cats. At least one was always mine. Anyway, I took a year of ‘light work’ after my BA, but finally went on for my MA in English.

    So, I went to take the Graduate Record Exam (GRE), and I think it’s the only time in my life I’ve been nervous for a test. And I went to bed that night and tossed and turned awhile before going to sleep. I woke up because my cat was clawing away at my chest in that “hey wake up Mom!” way that all cat owners know too well. I started to roll over and dump him off, but there was something in my hand. Confused, I sat up and turned on the light.

    Headless mouse body.

    I screamed bloody murder, threw it across the room and ran around the house waking everybody up. I’m sure my parents thought I’d been attacked. And the head, when my mother found it, was in my shoe. Ig.

  3. Hee… headless mice. Clever, you.

  4. Very,very creative! I love getting to the end of a story and feeling the twang of the Unexpected!

  5. Hahaha! It took me a very stressed out moment to get this!

  6. It’s so very clever. And a true twist on the theme.

    I still can’t reconcile cat or teen human, so I’m going with both. I’ve decided the 14 yo girls fell in love with a stray cat, and that kitty is owing her right back, in over zealous, rodent decapitating style.

  7. Ah, young love!
    Brilliantly deranged – love it!

  8. Headless mice? Ew! And Jester Queen’s story? I’m thankful my cats have not been hunters. Might sleep with my light on, just in case…

  9. A ha ha! Spoiled cats are problematic, I always find.

  10. Thanks so much for linking up to Trifextra. Remember, this weekend’s entries are being judged by the Trifecta community, so I hope you were able to cast your votes. Winners will be announced with the Monday post. Hope to see you back then.

  11. I liked this. Having a teenage girl in the house and a spolied 11 month old kitten, I liked it a lot.

    Good job

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